Inadequacies
by Raven Hallowryn
Summary: Three years after Equalist War, by a twist of fate and a compassionate hand, the man once known as Amon finds himself in a complex romantic relationship with what was once his greatest enemy and yet more surreal than that is the fact that they are heading to the South Pole for nothing less than a family event. (Amorra Fluff?)


(Plot Summary: After the Equalist War, Noatak was caught by the navy after Tarrlok died destroying their boat. Noatak used waterbending to survive the blast and was unharmed but did not resist when they placed in jail, feeling utterly defeated and having lost absolutely everything he ever had. Later, he was approached by the Avatar who was willing to grant him a second chance at a free life under certain conditions; little did they know that three years later they would be romantically involved and travelling together to a family function in the South Pole during Noatak broods over the many inadequacies of their unconventional relationship.

Tags: Fluff/Romance/Family/Angst/Comedy

Pairing: Amorra

Note: Thank you, mongoliantiger, for motivating me to write this. I dedicate it to you for all you support and for encouraging me to keep writing. I hope I did not disappoint.

I also want to dedicate this to masksarehot though, because she really needs something nice in her life right now so I thought some fluff might cheer her up, I hope this helps.)

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He didn't want to do it, he really truly didn't want to go.

Going all the way to South Pole where he would be surrounded by the Order of White Lotus and Korra's immediate family was the last thing Noatak wanted because as much as they behaved politely around him ever since Aok came into the picture, he was still completely convinced they hated him or at least -were highly suspicious of his every action and such an atmosphere was the last thing he needed at the moment.

And yet, here he was crossing the skies on the back of a Sky-Bison while Korra leaned on Naga and chatted animatedly with Pema and the airbender children, Rohan was perched on his mother's lap babbling cheerfully like any healthy three year old should. Noatak really hated this situation, being around these people was almost painful, not because he didn't like them but because he couldn't understand why they put up with him after everything he had done to them in the past… Well, that wasn't entirely true, he knew they took him in only out of respect for Korra but it was still hard to believe that they were willing to accept an old hated enemy so easily.

"Nervous, aren't you?" A voice mumbled to his left and he saw the stocky Bolin inch closer to him.

Of all of them, in past three years the earthbender had probably been the one that had changed the most, he had matured, he had begun to train metalbending and he even had facial hair. Mako and Asami remained the same though and at the moment were apparently busy discussing some heated topic so rather than meddle Bolin had decided to settle with the only other lonesome figure in the group. Luckily Bolin was one of the few that seemed to genuinely accept Noatak nowadays, at least after he got over the initial shock and fear.

"To what may you be referring?" Even without the mask, Noatak had long since learned to shield his expressions so he couldn't phantom how the earthbender had figured him out.

"It's your first time in the South Pole… I'd be scared to death if I were you." Bolin shrugged as if it were obvious.

"And why may that be?" Noatak replied in an attempt at remaining casual.

"Well…You used to be Amon, even if you're working for our side now and you're with Korra, it doesn't change that we're heading to the heart of the Order of White Lotus and they probably don't trust you even after three years."

"That does not bother me in the least." It was true, he didn't really care what the Order thought of him, that was not the reason he was uncomfortable with the current situation.

"Then what's the problem?" Bolin tilted his head in curiosity.

"Why do you assume there is a problem?"

"You have that sullen 'don't come near me' look on your face." The earthbender pointed out as politely as possible. "No offense."

"Do I? It must be your imagination." Noatak internally berated himself for being so obvious and attempted to relax his features.

"Well, ok but…"

Just then Bolin's words were cut off by an excited squeal from Ikki, the girl and her siblings (minus Rohan) flung themselves off the Sky-Bison, glider in hand, and made their way down to the icy cove where people in navy blue and white awaited along with an elderly figure in cerulean clothing.

Korra perched over the edge too and waved at the people below, despite his internal turmoil Noatak could not stop staring- she was beautiful when the icy polar winds wiped her hair around her face that way and the joy she openly displayed made her glow in that dusky sunlight, he wanted to burn that image into his brain.

At that second he remembered exactly why he was putting himself through all this, it was because of that smile of hers, the one that could melt all his defenses, the simple little expression that had changed how he saw the world and convinced him to try a different route after he admitted his total and utter defeat and found himself with nothing but regret and hatred in his life.

She could have hated him, in fact after what he did she should still despise him, but instead after Tarrlok was lost in that explosion and he was caught and imprisoned she pitied him, sure there was rage at first and it took her months to be able to face him again but apparently knowing his entire story made her want to be compassionate so she stretched out a sympathetic hand and offered a second chance, a way to make-up for his errors, and even though he called her naïve for trusting him so easily he accepted it because she had won, she had bested him, she had the right to command him and he no longer had any pride or goal to live by anyway.

Of course he wasn't really free, that wasn't what his second chance was about, he had to work all the dirty jobs the Council gave him at the risk of losing his own bending if he refused, not that he would care that much to keep it after all the pain it brought him; he also had to protect the Avatar he had once tried to destroy and he still had to wear that awful metal coil around his neck as demanded by the Council and the Police just in case the temptation of bloodbending became too great someday but all that was fine by him because it had only taken him a month of that new restricted life to find the one thing that made it all worth it and it was right under his nose- Korra.

Discovering his feelings for the Avatar had been… A unique experience, to say the least. He could still remember his own denial and distress, he admired her, he was grateful for her, he was attracted to all her power but he never wanted to actually _love_ her, that would be absurd and yet he could still recall the elated feeling of sadistic joy when she broke up with the firebender and he hadn't really resisted that hard when she started flirting with him no matter how inappropriate and clumsy her advances were.

At some point Noatak wondered if his infatuation with her was just a reaction to all that raw power and perhaps a physical attraction, after all Korra was more than just the Avatar, she was also extremely beautiful by all his parameters. It didn't take long for this assumption to change though because it wasn't her youthful body he craved to see the most, it was her smile; it wasn't her power that excited him the most either, it was the interest she showed in the real him.

In the end he gave in to her silly seduction and allowed his own careful self-control to break, by then he didn't even care if she was just using him as her rebound after Mako, she didn't have much to choose from anyway given that he was too protective in his bodyguard role to let any other males associate that much with her, something that surprisingly enough hadn't bothered her very much despite her independent nature- he had thought she didn't mind because her celebrity status was becoming a burden but now he suspected she just enjoyed his surreptitious jealousy.

Yet, after a few months of a secretive affair Korra showed no signs of letting go of him or of growing tired, or even of holding any lingering feelings for the firebender, she genuinely seemed interested in learning more about Noatak, she really appeared to enjoy his presence and when she started talking, in all seriousness, about letting their relationship become public he just felt all his carefully constructed barriers, all his pragmatic defenses, crumbling to dust. It was then that he admitted to himself how hopelessly in love he was with this woman.

It wasn't easy, in fact dealing with emotions he had never taken seriously before but that now burned him from the inside and having to trust someone with his true self were the most stressing things he had ever endured at a personal level, especially considering the complex past between them, but Korra had already proven she didn't think of the past, she lived in the moment and chased what she wanted and so long as what she wanted was Noatak he found that he could live with that alien sensation of vulnerability and his selfish desire to have her all to himself steeled his determination.

Yes, in a year and a half since the end of the Equalist War Noatak's goals and desires had changed radically, and now, three years after the war he barely understood how he could ever had become Amon in the first place and all he wanted was the one woman he should never ever be allowed to have and by some miracle she seemed just as fascinated by him and completely enamored too so even with all the resentment, judgment and downright hatred that fell upon them when the relationship became public Noatak just couldn't find it in himself to care. Him, a man that had always carefully crafted his words to manipulate the public; him, the man that held public appearances so highly before, now couldn't care less so long as Korra remained happy.

And yet…

"Noatak?" Korra's smoky voice brought him back from his wandering thoughts down memory lane. They had already landed and Tenzin's family was having a warm reunion with Katara with whom they would be staying for a few days.

"Yes?" He still stared at her but paid more attention to her words this time.

"You coming?" Korra nodded towards the gathered people in the snow, looking completely clueless as to what he might be thinking.

"Of course." Noatak stood and moved to help her get off their ride, she could have just gotten off the Sky-Bison alone but considering the delicate cargo in the sling on her back he wasn't about to let her jump out as usual.

It was a short stop, as much as Korra wanted to linger around and talk to Katara and as much as the White Lotus elders wanted to talk to Korra's friends while shooting furtive glances at Noatak, probably to enquire about his recent conduct, this was just a pit stop. Tenzin and his family would stay with his mother but the Avatar, Asami, Bolin, Mako, Aok and Noatak were supposed to keep travelling south a little longer towards their final destination and they really did not have time to spare.

This time they travelled by sleigh, somehow Korra had managed to convince Tenzin to let Naga come along even though it was a lot more added weight on Oogie and left them cramped but now the polar bear dog was making it all worth it by pulling their massive sleigh along with another such beast named Nikko, apparently the second animal was familiar with Naga because despite the solitary nature of polar bear dogs they seemed to get along right away and moved well together at good pace.

Asami continuously complained about the cold, she wasn't really annoying though, just repetitive and Noatak was stunned that Aok wasn't actively screaming in boredom already but he took the tranquility as something positive. Bolin and Mako were almost too quiet out of fear that they might get lost in the snow if they distracted Korra with talk, after all she was the only one who truly knew the way but their worries were unfounded seeing has Naga was leading the sleigh by memory and in half an hour they had reached their destination- Korra's birthplace.

They had barely just stopped and a woman with twin braids was already rushing to meet them and in two seconds flat Korra was crushing the woman in a tight embrace.

"Mom! I missed you so much!" The Avatar actually lifted the lithe woman off the snow and spun around a little with delight.

"I missed you too, Korra." Senna chuckled and hugged her daughter before pulling away slightly to examine Korra from head to toe. "You look beautiful, sweetie, I'll glad to see you bounced back so quickly."

"Thanks, mom." The Avatar grinned smugly and Senna nodded warmly.

"Hello, Noatak." Senna smiled courteously and gave a slight nod in his direction.

"Good day, madam." He replied with equal distant courtesy.

"And hello to all of you as well. I'm so glad you could come, Tonraq will be overjoyed." The small woman smiled at Korra's friends as well, greeting them with warm familiarity. To Noatak it seemed like the difference between her brittle politeness towards him and her warmth towards the others was the same as the difference between stone and flame, he didn't _want_ to be bothered by it but he was.

"Hello, Mrs. S. Thanks for having us." Bolin replied cheerfully and polite as always just before Asami and Mako greeted the woman as well.

As for Noatak, he took on the task of securing the sleigh and leading the polar bear dogs to the igloo where they would stay for the time being. He had never really been to this place but Korra had already explained the layout of things and though he was aware that he was already isolating himself from the others he simply couldn't help it.

Noatak was used to being a charismatic controlled person who could read anyone and lead any conversation confidently, he was used to being the center of attention and pulling the strings behind a crowd but there was something about this tiny little Water Tribe village that unsettled him- for starters it far too similar to his own birthplace, the intense cold that seeped all the way into his bones and made his breath come out in foggy puffs was like the embrace of an old friend, he almost expected to see his mother walk out one of the many huts at any second even though it was impossible, he almost imagined he could hear Yakone's voice in the wind and it innerved him immensely; that wasn't all though, what was really rattling his nerves was that Bolin was right, this was the first time he would be walking into the house of Korra's parents, they knew him well enough already, they had visited Republic City a few times and after the first disastrous confrontation when the Avatar admitted to being in love with the man previously known as Amon they had grown to accept him but it was different now, it was hard for Noatak to be confident when this was their territory and he knew how much they still judged him.

Suddenly, just as he finished taking care of Naga and Nikko, a loud wailing cry pierced the air, it cut through the sound of the wind and cheerful babble of conversation between Korra, her friends and her mother that were carrying minor bundles of luggage towards the house. The sound was startling but not alarming at all and yet Noatak rushed towards Korra out of instinct and was prying the infant that wailed on a purple sling on the Avatar's back before she could even turn.

Aok's cries simmered down to sniffles almost immediately, apparently the little boy had had enough of quietly admiring the landscape and wanted some attention, all in all Noatak was shocked the child had behaved so well so far into the trip given how much he resembled Korra in terms of excitability.

"Ah, my little grandson is so big now!" Senna remarked with amazement, getting a good look at the child for the first time before she opened her arms. "May I?"

Reluctantly, Noatak handed the child over to Senna, it didn't bother him that other people held his son, it was just hard to let go of him willingly for some inexplicable reason. The boy had indeed grown since the last time Korra's parents had been in Republic City- his puffy coffee-colored hair was longer and tied in a tiny side-braid, he weighed almost twice as much and already had a few teeth, his dark cinnamon skin was marred with a scrape or two from crawling all over the place now that he had learned to be mobile on his own, his distinct pale blue eyes were more attentive than ever and with each passing day he looked more and more like Korra with his multitude of expressions.

Here resided another reason why Noatak was so uncomfortable in this place. He didn't really give a damn what people thought about the fact that the Avatar and Amon had had a child together, it hadn't really been planned but it had never been unwelcome to them either and even if it had nobody was entitled to comment about it so far as Noatak was concerned, Korra often called him freakishly overprotective but he called himself cautious. However, bringing his son to this rural little settlement in the South Pole was reminding him of many inadequacies that, try as he may, he could not overcome.

One of these shortages, the main one to exact, was the fact that he and Korra were not married. It wasn't for lack of trying, he had asked her to marry him more than once but she refused by stubbornly stating that she wasn't going to do it just because it was expected of them, apparently she was under the impression that he only wanted her as his wife because of Aok. Noatak was determined to prove Korra wrong but until he actually convinced her to accept the engagement they were bound to be subject of much gossip and although he didn't care about such a thing he knew her family probably did not take it kindly that they had skipped matrimony and jumped right into parenthood, especially with Korra being so young and full of responsibility. And he worried for his son given that Aok already had to grow up with the weight of having such notorious parents, the boy didn't need to endure anymore stigma over his head, he didn't need to be called a bastard child any more than he already had been by the press.

Once again, Noatak snapped out of his brooding thoughts only when he noticed that Korra was staring at him with suspiciously narrowed eyes while Senna nuzzled the baby and invited everyone inside after the little reunion in the snow. Aok seemed more interested in playing with his grandmother's hair than actually paying any attention to the woman though.

Much to Noatak's relief, the inside of the house was not like his childhood home, it had many similar traits that were nostalgic and familiar but as a whole it was very different and that was somewhat reassuring to him. There was an abundance of food strewn over the table and that in particular was a bit too much like his mother's cooking but luckily it evoked welcome memories so he didn't linger on the thought.

"Where's dad?" Korra looked around as if the huge man could go unnoticed in the little house.

"He should be back soon. I sent him out because I didn't want him to know what I was cooking for tonight." Senna smiled widely, bouncing the baby in her arms playfully.

At that Korra smirked at her mother and said only- "Apple cakes?"

Both women promptly burst out laughing much to everyone else's confusion; apparently it was a family joke but after a moment their laughter softened to chuckles and the Avatar was retrieving her son and hoisting him on her hip confidently as she surveyed what still needed to be done for the party.

"Well, I hope he comes back soon, we can't have a birthday celebration without the birthday boy." Korra was still resisting the urge to chuckle as she spoke.

Tasks were quickly distributed to everyone- Mako would be helping Senna cook the last few things left, Bolin would work with Korra to fix up the two small spare rooms with earthbending which was surprisingly easy since this was one of the very few areas in the Pole with rock so near the surface of the ice, Asami would be handling music and entertainment, and Noatak was charged with putting Aok to sleep and feeding the polar bear dogs, both tasks suited him just fine as they allowed some degree of solitude, oddly enough he was becoming more and more uncomfortable towards adult interaction lately.

By the time everything was done and Senna was explaining to everyone that Tonraq's northern relatives were supposed to come as well but had been delayed a couple of days, Korra was checking on Aok and they heard a shuffle of snow outside as the door squeaked open.

Large, imposing and yet kind-looking as always, Tonraq stepped into the house and stopped on his tracks staring at everyone in surprise. Apparently, he hadn't been expecting the sudden visit.

"Huh… Hello." Tonraq stared at his wife for an explanation before looking at everyone else. "What's going on here?"

"Happy birthday, Mr. T." Bolin greeted right away, politely reaching out to grasp the man's forearm in a gesture of Water Tribe politeness.

"Yes, happy birthday." Asami actually stood on tiptoes to peck the man's cheek.

"I hope we're not intruding." Mako mirrored his brother's actions and greeted Korra's father as well.

"No, no, I just wasn't expecting this." Tonraq grinned wildly. "Thanks for coming."

"Congratulations on the milestone." Noatak didn't really approach the man but he was as cordial as can be.

"Thank you." Tonraq replied before looking around the room just as Korra had when she was searching for him. "Where's my Korra?"

"Right here, dad." The Avatar walked out of her old childhood room and practically tackled the huge man, lifting him up as easily as she had lifted her mother earlier. "Happy birthday, old man."

"Thanks, darling." Tonraq smiled and embraced his daughter back, ruffling her ponytails playfully. "Looking good, kiddo."

"Always." She stuck out her tongue sassily.

"Did you…"

"Yes, I brought the baby, dad." Korra replied before the man even had a chance to finish the question.

"Where is he?" Tonraq seemed more excited to see Aok than he did about the impending celebration.

"Sleeping. You can see him later." The Avatar chuckled and dragged the man with her towards the table.

It didn't take long to get the party started, Korra was enthusiastic and voracious with the food, she also delighted her parents with stories of her latest exploits as Avatar and milestones of her child's growth, Senna was mesmerized by the stories, Tonraq was in high-spirits and appreciated any excused to pull out some typical Water Tribe liquor that got Bolin and Asami tipsy with just a glass which resulted in loud off-key but cheerful singing, Mako laughed at his brother's antics and traded jokes and dry puns with Tonraq.

Only Noatak remained in his corner close to Korra, watching and sipping occasionally on his drink while feeling absolutely out of place, he almost wished Chief Unalaq hadn't been delayed because then he'd either have a northerner to talk to or there would be enough people around so he could slip out unnoticed, unfortunately neither option was possible so he settled with sitting there, letting the cold burn of Water Tribe Frostbite liquor pour down his throat as he replied to the occasional question or otherwise just stared into the translucent pale blue liquid in his cup as he thought of the things that had been bothering him lately- he had thought he could be happy with what he had with Korra and not care about the rest of the world but the more time passed the more he felt affected by the inadequacies of their relationship… And realized he wanted more.

At some point Noatak had to cut his musings short though because found himself watching a bizarre show- Korra was locked in an arm-wrestling match against Mako while Bolin had the same duel with Asami. The latter two seemed so inebriated by now that Miss Sato just had to flutter her lashes to distract Bolin and win, as for Korra she defeated Mako in three seconds flat without breaking a sweat and the two brothers had no choice but to wallow in their shame much to everyone's amusement. The Avatar then faced off against Asami and, surprisingly, even tipsy the raven-haired woman managed to last almost ten seconds longer than Mako before she admitted defeat.

"Any more takers?" Korra asked with a smug smirk, raising her fist victoriously as Bolin wept drunkenly and Asami giggled and stumbled over to the old record-player.

Tonraq took the challenge and despite his enormous frame and muscular biceps that were twice as large as the Avatar's it was still an even match- Korra was grinning to hide the effort, Tonraq taunted her but his hand trembled to keep up the strength. It took so long that Asami and Mako started betting on who would win, with the raven-head backing up Korra and Mako cheering on Tonraq to defend his bruised ego. Noatak began to take interest in the duel despite himself, he couldn't see how Korra could be so evenly matched with her enormous father without cheating but then again Amon had never believed the Avatar could defeat him either and she had.

Korra muttered something under her breath and whatever it was it surprised Tonraq enough to cause a single faltering second in his steady grip that Korra used to win. She then punched both arms into the air while doing a little victory jiggle.

"And the Avatar goes undefeated once again!" Korra announced with boisterous energy, laughing when Mako slapped a crumpled yuan note onto Asami's palm.

"Undefeated my buttocks, I used to beat you at this all the time." Tonraq complained half-heartedly, barely hiding a smile.

"Yeah, when I was four." The Avatar stuck her tongue out teasingly and took a sip of her drink before leaning back casually. "The only person who ever beats me at arm-wrestling these days is Noatak so all you can just give up."

Most eyes in the room turned in his direction and suddenly Noatak wasn't enjoying the show anymore. He loved seeing Korra happy, her goofy displays of smug power were always amusing, but he wished she hadn't said that because even though he could almost smirk at the idea of having the upper-hand on her in something, the truth was that when he arm-wrestled Korra he always cheated, it was in his nature to use any means to win and she knew that.

"Well, now I'm curious. Care for a little demonstration?" Tonraq was already taking stance, elbow firm on the table and staring right at Noatak in challenge.

"I'd rather not duel anyone on their birthday." Noatak deflected diplomatically. He doubted he could defeat Tonraq's brute strength without cheating, he had considerable strength himself but next to this man he was more of a skilled nimble fighter rather than a powerhouse and the methods of distraction he often used on Korra would never work on her father. Of course, he could always use another _skill_, he could always bloodbend just a little, just enough to win and nobody would be any wiser but he refused to do so out of principle.

"C'mon! What are you afraid of? Consider it your gift to me." Tonraq insisted pleasantly with a grin, his expressions were always so incredibly similar to Korra's and yet there was also something more polite and regal about them that was hard to place.

In the end Noatak gave in, what good would it do to galvanize his host over something so small anyway? Besides, he didn't mind losing and if that made the man happy then it was worth it.

The little arm-wrestling match lasted longer than Noatak expected, he hadn't thought he could rival the man so evenly for so long but after a minute and a half he could no longer feel his own fingers, his biceps were cramping and his bones felt like hollow old rusty iron piping about to snap- he had to concede his defeat. Tonraq rejoiced in the victory but as he cracked his knuckles he admitted that he couldn't feel his own fingers either and everyone laughed and poured another rounds of drinks.

The little game led to stories about Tonraq always teasing his brother about such games and then it led to anecdotes of Korra's childhood when she constantly challenged people to duels and that steered into Asami's stories with her self-defense classes as a kid and to Mako and Bolin's tales of their own mischief which guided them into their passion of Pro-Bending.

The conversation escalated rowdily and more laughter and rambunctious singing was stirred up, meanwhile Noatak had retreated back into his corned and his cup, enjoying the tidbits of information that were being passed around but remaining silent with his own thoughts once again, he had no pleasant stories to share and the games had taken away some of his tension but he was still far from comfortable.

"So how many does this make, really?" Mako's question was directed at Tonraq after a particularly long story about a past birthday celebration that had included some elaborate food pranks from Senna's side, but although Noatak kept drinking silently his curiosity was peaked- how old _was_ Korra's father? He hadn't really been able to glean the answer yet.

"A nice round number." Tonraq replied cryptically, taking a self-conscious swig from his generous cup.

"Forty." Korra and Senna replied in unison, laughing at the man's embarrassment.

Noatak choked on his drink and accidentally sprayed liquid down his clothes in his shock. Forty? Korra's father was FORTY?

«But that means I am the eldest person in this room!» Noatak thought to himself with no small amount of horror. He wondered if Korra's parents even knew that he was forty-three, he didn't think so, if they did then they would most likely be appalled by his romance with their daughter. Just one more gigantic inadequacy to tear down his once adamantine self-confidence.

"You ok there?" Tonraq asked with playful worry, Noatak had choked hard enough to attract attention and was attempting to cough himself back into shape.

"Fine. Simply drank too quickly." Noatak cleared his throat with a little embarrassment and set down his cup.

All he wanted was an excuse to get out of there quickly; from the corner of his eye he could see Korra watching him with that suspicious narrowed gaze again and he didn't like it because he knew that when she wanted she could be more perceptive than people thought but during such moments she tended to blurt out inconvenient commentary. Before she could say anything though, Bolin was the one who spoke, he seemed to be doing math though with his fingers given his tipsy state.

"Wait, that means you had Korra when you were…"

"Twenty." Tonraq replied with a shrugged. "Senna was eighteen."

"I guess Korra really does take after us, doesn't she?" Senna chuckled and rubbed her daughter's shoulder gently. The woman had a point though- that explained why they had never been apprehensive that the Avatar had become a mother at the age of nineteen.

"Wow, you got married really young." Bolin exclaimed out in reply.

"Not really. It may seem odd to people in the United Nations nowadays but we lived in a very traditional Water Tribe setting where most girls were of age and married at sixteen or seventeen so, really, we were just part of the norm." Senna smiled, approaching the matter casually and reminiscing fondly.

"And it doesn't bother you that…" Before Mako could finish his own question on the matter he was interrupted by the demanding wails coming from the next room.

"I'll get him." Grasping at the miraculous excuse that Aok provided, Noatak nearly rushed to leave the room before the conversation steered into deeper waters.

The baby had sat up in the pelts of Korra's old bed and was still screeching by the time Noatak slipped inside but as soon as he closed the door and moved closer the boy settled into whiny little sniffles and crawled to him in that little dark winter coat Asami had given him as present and that for some reason seemed to always fit no matter how much he grew in past few months.

Noatak picked up the boy and realized the problem immediately- Aok needed a diaper change. He didn't mind, Korra had been the squeamish one at first before she got used to having to care of the child's every need but he had never had any issues with anything. In fact changing Aok, feeding him, bathing him, dressing him, those were all tasks Noatak executed with easy practicality and he enjoyed them, they gave him time to think and disconnect from anyone but his son and that was more relaxing than any sort of meditation, the boy just had a talent when it came to relaxing him even if at the moment the kid was kicking wildly making a mess with talc powder while trying to chew the talc container as Noatak attempted to change his wrappings. He didn't care, it made him laugh and that was an impressive feat, Noatak didn't laugh much since Tarrlok's death, he only managed to smile thanks to Korra and Aok was the one thing that still made him laugh so honestly.

Just as he was finishing up, unaware of the blotch of white dust on his face, Korra slipped into the room and closed the door quietly behind her.

"Everything alright?" The Avatar asked softly, leaning a shoulder to the wall.

"Yes. He just needed changing." Noatak held the boy in his arms and proceeded to pat away the mess of talc from the child's clothes.

"I didn't mean Aok." Korra retorted with a little crease forming on her forehead.

"…" Noatak looked at her hesitating to reply and then sat on the bed with his son. "I'm fine, Korra. You don't have to keep looking at me like that."

"Like what?"

"Like you're trying to find something wrong." He accused just a little bit irritated.

"I'm not trying, I know something's wrong." The Avatar crossed her arms stubbornly and stared at him with those intense sapphire eyes that he had learned to love so much. "Is all this bad mood because you didn't want to come here? Does it remind you of…?" She trailed off but he knew exactly what she was asking.

"No, Korra." He assured her.

"Is it because of… Of our shared past? Is that stuff coming back to you?" Her brows pinched into a V as she frowned further and he wondered who had put that idea in her head.

"No."

This time his reply was final and curt, he wanted her to stop prying, after all how could he explain to her everything that bothered him? How could he point out the flaws in their relationship without hurting her? How could he speak of the discomfort he had around others when they were just on the other side of the door? And what if he did say it all? It would just escalate into a meaningless fight about all this personal issues and the last thing he wanted was to waste time fighting, especially in front of his infant son.

Korra could read the mood so she picked up Aok, holding him to her as Noatak put everything away and cleaned up, she didn't seem to have given up yet though. He was quiet and strived to appear collected but he could see by her ever-deepening frown that she her mind was working a mile a minute even with her blushed cheeks giving away that she had been a liberal on the booze herself; she was still scrutinizing him even as he wiped white powder from his face. From the corner of his eye he saw Aok tugging the collar of her shirt and peeking inside, the eight-month old was probably looking for an easy meal but Korra didn't seem to notice and Noatak didn't resist the opportunity to make an off comment as the baby tried to pull the clothing down her neck.

"He seems to be looking for something. He probably agrees that there's something missing from around mama's lovely neck." Noatak didn't mean to sound sarcastic but his words came out snarky anyway.

"So that's it? This is all because I won't marry you?" Korra snapped and rolled her eyes in annoyance. "We talked about it already."

"It's not that you won't, it's that you doubt my sincerity when I say that I want to marry you because I love you and not because it is expected of us." He retorted much too coldly in accusation but a moment later he took a steadying breath to even out his tone. "You could at least wear the betrothal necklace and consider the matter, it's not necessarily binding."

"I'll think about it." Korra huffed in annoyance but she had never caved in so quickly before so he took it as victory. "So is that what this mood of yours is all about?"

"Not really." He shook his head and retrieved Aok from her arms for no reason other than the fact that he wanted to hold the baby close, it comforted him, that and Korra seemed a little off balance at the moment.

"Then what?" She crossed her arms, now getting irritated by his avoidance of the issue. "Is it because you're old?"

"You mean older than your _father_?" Noatak emphasized the word a little bitterly. "Well, that certainly doesn't help my mood, no."

"Why is that a problem?" Korra asked, her tone getting more and more snippy.

"Do they even know?" He demanded.

"They suspect. So what? I'm a responsible adult and I love you, in those circumstances age is just a number." She did an awkward crossed-arm shrug and began to sulk.

"Is it?" Noatak retorted icily, he was starting to regret going into such an argument with his son in his arms but he was far too irritated by her condescending attitude to care that much.

"Yeah. Heck, look at Tenzin and Pema! Fifteen years age difference and they're the happiest couple I know with a whole gang of kids." Korra uncrossed her arms to toss them in the air in frustration and yet full of confidence.

"Fifteen and twenty-three are quite distinct gaps, Korra." Noatak replied flatly.

"Do I look like I care? I like you no matter what." She continued to sulk and if he weren't so predisposed to argue he would almost have been mesmerized by her adorable angry pout.

"That is not the issue." Noatak stated with steely hard-won calm.

"Then what is? What the others think? Nobody cares, Noatak." Korra's voice rose, she wasn't quite shouting but she was obviously angry and it was making Aok agitated.

"As much as I admit that our age gap is one of many shortfalls in our relationship, it is not what has been bothering me." He attempted to put an end to the subject diplomatically while soothing the child but Korra wouldn't have it.

"Then what is?" She demanded, still irate.

"This is not the time to discuss this matter." He defended, giving Aok a pointed look as a warning towards Korra's temper.

"But…" Her tone softened as she got the hint but she remained stubborn.

"Not now, Korra." Noatak replied even more firmly.

"Noatak…" Korra sighed and then quickly strode over to him, plucking the baby from his arms and setting him in her old playpen before she pushed Noatak onto the bed and pinned him under her with her hands on his shoulders. She was so fast and wobbly that rather than resist her, his first instinct was to look at Aok but she grabbed his jaw to make him look at her, speaking with a hostile voice. "The kid is fine, look at me instead."

"I think you've had a bit too much to drink, Avatar." He accused not with any real complaint but to try and disregard her attitude.

"Just listen, alright?" Korra nearly shouted again, her tone brimming with frustration but when he didn't reply her face morphed from exasperation to discouraged sadness and she pleaded-"Please?"

"As you wish." Noatak conceded at last, unable to handle that depressed look of hers.

"Look… Hm… I don't really know how to handle this so I'll just say it." She stumbled over the words awkwardly before staring right into his eyes with determination. "I can see you getting more and more reclusive every day, I can see the way you get uncomfortable and suspicious when anyone tries to strike up friendly conversation with you, I can see it all. We all see it, we all notice and it's pretty damn obvious what's going on."

"And what is that?" Noatak enquired, trying to shield his surprise with faux ignorance.

"You've become paranoid. You think everyone despises you, heck, you think the only reason people are nice to you is because of me and it's not true! Sure, so you did some horrible unforgivable things in the past but that doesn't mean you haven't earned respect for the person you are now." Her grip on his shoulders tightened as she attempted to hold back some sort of emotion that was cracking her voice.

"I appreciate what you are trying to do, my dear, but we both know that try as I may to seek redemption people will never believe I have changed and they shouldn't, after the things I've done the last thing I deserve is their acceptance." Noatak didn't speak with any sort of self-pity, he actually believed his words, it didn't help that he also thought he hadn't changed that much, he spoke with practicality but that only made Korra even more upset.

"There you go again! I know you think you don't deserve to be happy, I know you still think you deserve to be punished even though you've suffered so much already but, damn it, nobody judges you as harshly as you judge yourself, I know a lot of people still hate you, I know a lot of people think what we have is…is…"

"Abhorrent?" He offered when she seemed at loss for a proper word.

"Yeah, that." She conceded before swallowing dryly and continuing her rant. "But the thing is, nobody hates you as much as you think, nobody really hates you as much as you have grown to hate yourself, Noatak, and that's making you think that nobody likes you because you don't believe they should, you don't think you earned it."

"Are you trying to imply that your friends and family actually _like_ me?" There was so much sarcasm in the question, how could there not be? "That's a hard story to swallow even by your outlandish standards."

"Noatak, I'm the one Amon hurt the most and yet I'm the one who loves you the most now. Isn't that enough proof that people can like you?" Korra almost shook in her despair to get him to accept the words. "Everyone has been walking on eggshells because they don't know how to talk to you anymore, they don't want you to misinterpret them and think they only bear with you because of me."

"Who exactly are 'they' that you speak of?" Noatak enquired, he figured that if she could actually point out names rather than generalize then there might be truth to her words but he mostly just wanted to push her to keep talking and he didn't know why, probably because he didn't want to answer.

"Everyone that matters, Noatak." She replied sincerely. "My dad likes you even though he still finds some things about our relationship annoying, my mom sees you as family, Mako thinks you're doing a great job for the Council and the Police even if he won't admit it, Bolin sees you as a friend and so does Asami, Tenzin and Pema want you to stop feeling guilty for the kidnapping during the war because they understand your reasons now and you've been nothing but repentant towards them especially since Aok was born, the airbabies admire you now as well, Katara is fond of you, even Lin grudgingly admits that she's learned to respect you." Korra spilled all that out in a frantic rush but then took a deep slow breath and exhaled so she could finish her reasoning more steadily. "And then there's me and Aok, we love you no matter what, we always will and everyone else can see that, they are all grateful to you for making us happy."

"…" Noatak was at loss for words for a moment, he wanted to believe her, he didn't like that he was so hung up on the opinion of others but he really did want to believe her. Rather than come up with a reply though all he could do was admire the incredible amount of insight she had just displayed, he hadn't expected her to know him so well. "For exactly how long have you been thinking about this?"

"Weeks." Korra sighed out the word when his tone confirmed just how accurately she had hit the mark, she sagged a little, as if all this had been burdening her but only now was she sure of what it all meant and it was exhausting her.

"And alcohol loosened your tongue?" Noatak sounded slightly less distant now, for some unknown reason he felt gratitude and affection flooding him.

"…Maybe." She pouted reluctantly, her cheeks were even redder and he knew not if the alcohol was to blame or if she was just that flustered.

"Korra…" Noatak breathed out her name, he was about to argue her point out of vain resistance but she cut him off with a finger to his lips.

"Don't even try to argue." The Avatar ordered sulkily before she rolled off him and sat on the bed beside him. "Look, let's make a deal."

"Deal?" Noatak sat up as well, looking at her with extreme curiosity.

"I'll wear the darn necklace and in return you go back to being an over-confident bastard and get along with everyone like a normal human being." Korra gave in, she didn't appear reluctant though, she was just too proud to surrender so easily.

"…Not enough." Noatak thought about her offer for five seconds before he decided that if he was going to have to overcome such overwhelming personal issues then he wanted more than just a possible engagement.

"What else do you want from me?" Korra rolled her eyes again but her fake annoyance was endearing to him.

"Marry me and I'll accept everything you just told me." He proposed, while adding in his thoughts- «Prove to me that I can have you forever and I won't care about their reasons, I'll be part of the family whether they like it or not and I'll enjoy it.»

"Well, at least I can't say you've lost your manipulative streak." Korra grimaced a little.

"You started this." He pointed out with some amusement.

"Ok, ok. Fine." She surrendered, going as far as holding up her hands in defeat. "I'll marry you." Korra smiled a little as she spoke but before he could react she was playfully adding- "But I don't want you complaining about the age thing again and don't expect me to be a classic little wife that irons socks and crap like that."

"Wouldn't dream of it." Noatak actually chuckled and leaned close to plant a kiss on her lips.

The kiss started out as soft and filled with appreciation and overwhelming love but it quickly morphed into a deeper and more passionate mash of lips with their tongues dancing around each other sensually while they embraced for so long that it became hard to breath and the wooziness of it all was as intoxicating as the alcohol from earlier. At least in this department, when it came to passion and physical connection, they were, without a ghost of a doubt, a perfect match.

They only really broke the kiss when Aok started fussing and trying to climb out of the playpen to get their attention. Korra chuckled and disentangled from Noatak's arms to pick up the baby again and as she did so Noatak walked over to the bags they had brought along and rummaged inside one until he found what he wanted and walked back to Korra, holding up the item in question.

It was a beautifully crafted choker made iridescent blue snake skin leather with a crescent moon-shaped opal hanging from it and carved with elegant waves. Korra had seen it before, he had presented it to her on enough occasions already but every time she saw it she was always stunned by how pretty it was.

"Come here." Noatak waved for her to come closer as he held up the necklace.

"For Yue's sake, have you been carrying that thing around everywhere you go?" Korra gave him a flat frown but she wasn't truly bothered, just a little embarrassed.

"Yes." He admitted as if it was perfectly normal. "Turn." He requested and Korra complied, still holding the curious Aok in her arms as Noatak pushed her hair aside and slipped the choker around her neck, clasping it in place so the opal moon fell elegantly on the hollow of her throat. Aok reached for it with a chubby hand almost immediately.

"Happy now?" Korra turned her head to look at him with a smirk on her lips.

"More than I can convene in words." Noatak replied with an equal smug smirk, wrapping his arms around her waist and kissing her cheek.

"Can we join the others now? I'm pretty sure dad is dying to see Aok by now." Korra chuckled and held up the babbling baby for emphasis.

"Then by all means, let us indulge him." Noatak consented in much better a mood than he had been in weeks.

As they walked out of the room, everyone seemed to be gathered around the table talking, with Asami and Senna casually playing Pai-Sho. The raven-head seemed a lot more sober now but Bolin was still wobbling in place and trying to get Mako to sing with him while Tonraq laughed and teased them for being light-weights with the booze.

"You guys certainly took your time." Mako pointed out as soon as he noticed Korra, Noatak and Aok.

"Sorry, we had something to talk about." Korra excused quickly.

"Ah, Okee! Give me! Give me!" Tonraq stretched his arms towards the baby in Korra's and spoke with almost childish excitement. As soon as he had the boy in his lap Tonraq began petting him making the silliest noises while Aok tried to hang onto the man's beard. "Who's a good boy?"

"Dad, he's not a pet." The Avatar shook her head with a grin and sat on the other side of the table in front of her father with Noatak taking her side.

"Sush, don't tell me how to greet my grandson." Tonraq retorted jokingly with a squeaky voice that made the boy laugh like there was no tomorrow.

"Ok, knock yourself out." Korra laughed as well but one thing bugged her and she had to address it. "His name is Aok though, I wish you would cut it out with the silly nicknames."

"It wasn't my idea to give the kid such a creepy name." Tonraq replied sullenly before giving Noatak an apologetic look. "No offense."

"Do you think I named him? I can see why you assume so given…certain facts about my ancestry but I assure you that Korra is the only one to blame for our son's name." Noatak replied with no small amount of amusement. "Personally I wanted Rui, though Aok has grown on me."

"Oh…I'm sorry, I thought…Oh." Tonraq was suddenly flustered and rubbing the back of his head self-consciously. "Man, do I feel stupid now."

"Think nothing of it." Noatak actually allowed himself to smile naturally with his old confidence that used to charm the masses.

"You seem to be in a better mood." Senna noted with a bright smile. "That's wonderful."

"Yes." Noatak nodded in agreement. "And I'd like to apologize for my cold demeanor earlier, I wasn't aware that I was being rude."

"It's alright, don't worry about…" Senna's last words were drowned by Bolin's as the earthbender leaned over the table in front of Korra to peer at the jewel around her neck.

"Hey, is that…?" Bolin let his words trail as he pointed at the necklace.

"Huh?" Tonraq turned to look and his voice rose excitedly. "FINALLY! No wonder he's in a better mood, she finally gave in!"

"Geez, Korra, how stubborn can you be? The poor guy was probably stressing out over the wait for who knows how long." Mako gave Korra a reproachful shake of his head.

"What, so I'm the bad guy now?" Korra attempted to act offended but she was too happy to really carry through with the farce.

"No, just as clueless as always, miss Avatar." Asami stepped into the conversation with a good natured smile and a pat to Korra's back. "Congrats."

"How did you finally convince her?" Tonraq turned to Noatak with amazed curiosity while still bouncing the baby on his leg. "I was starting to think she'd never get married."

"Had to get her drunk apparently." Noatak joked casually and almost everybody laughed in reply.

"Of shut up." Korra pouted with her cheeks now burning. "Just be happy I said yes." She leaned to him, kissing his lips just to hide her embarrassment.

"I am." Noatak replied, kissing back sweetly.

The kiss dragged on for a few seconds too long and somebody wolf-whistled loudly, apparently it was Senna much to their surprise, and the sound made them break apart with the Avatar now more red than ever and Noatak struggling not to mirror her blush while everyone laughed and teased and made playful remarks. How had he not felt this atmosphere before? How had he confused this level of intimacy with chilly and reluctant acceptance?

To mask her embarrassment Korra called out to Aok, the baby had grown bored and crawled out of his grandfather's lap to play with the fluffy edges of Bolin's coat in search of something chewable. At the sound of his mother's voice Aok looked up and began crawling over but to her shock he bypassed Korra entirely and moved to Noatak, stretching his arms to his father.

Noatak chuckled at Korra's sulky pout and, with an immeasurable sense of love and pride that he didn't remember having ever experienced to this extent before in his life, he picked up the boy that settled in his lap as Noatak fed him chewy but sweet apple slices while the Avatar complained that everyone wanted to mock her that day. However, as the laugher and excitement died down and everyone's energy burned out, Korra ended up leaning to Noatak's side, her head tipping over his shoulder as his arm went automatically around her waist, his other hand was also soon trapped when Aok used it as a pillow, clinging to his fingers with tiny little hands and sucking on his father's knuckles.

It was surreal to think that this was Noatak's life now, for forty years he had never even considered such an option for himself and would never believed it if he was told he would marry the Avatar of all people but now he wanted nothing more than for that evening to last forever. Everything was falling into place at last, everything was going to be alright and if something went wrong along the way they could always fix it… Together.

~~~~~~.:oOo:.~~~~~~

_(Author's Note: Woah, that escalated quickly! This was supposed to a 2k comedy fic about an uncomfortable Noatak but it spiraled into this! The hell happened?!_

_Here are some notes of things you need to know about this story:_

_The metal coil- this collar that Noatak wears makes a stark contrast to Korra's betrothal necklace. I introduced this in another fic, it's a sharp metal coil that can only be safely removed via metalbending and the point of it is that if the person wearing it attempts to turn against the law or harm anyone, any metalbending police officer can control the collar in instants to choke or potentially kill. I'd say it's more effective than an electronic anklet._

_Names- "Aok" is an Inuit name that means 'blood', Tonraq assumed Noatak had chosen the name because of his bloodbender ancestry and was therefore upset because he thought it was a sign of bloodbender pride when in reality Korra probably picked it without even realizing the meaning. "Rui" in this case is a Chinese name that means 'precious life (like a gem)'.)_


End file.
